Андрея не перешибешь, но:
Swine Flu - a light cold associated with deficiency of pork products, treatable by bacon, breakfast sausages, ham, pork chops, drinkable lard and, in rare cases, by rare Ukrainian import " Salo v Shokoladi". Reportedly created by scientists sponsored by producers of Mad Cow Steaks & Avian Flu Nuggets.
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Хочу лето (или нормальную зиму)